Good evening ladies & gentlemen. All I can really say about this Vikings season:
Thank god we kept JA 69.
MVP OF THE WEEK: Megatron with 329 gad damn motherfuckin yards. Jeez does Larry Fitz have that all season? Dwayne Bowe doesn’t.
LVP OF THE WEEK: Ross has be salty with Darren Sproles, who put up 0 points in a 35-17 win over the Bills. Ross only lost by 7 to my last place ranked team.
BOSTON STRONG AWARD: Going to have to retire to award after the Sox win the World Series tonight. You guys think its a joke? Freakin Ben Affleck is Batman. Boston runs this planet.
BRANDON BURNS MEMORIAL “THATS INTERESTING” AWARD: Speaking of Dwayne Bowe….looks like Kranz cut him after a pathetic attempt at a fantasy season by the Chiefs WR. He signed a big contract before the year too. Looks like I was right all along about him being a bum!!!! Ebrostradamus slow burn baby! He has scored twice this year, but less than 40 yards and 4 catches most games.. pretty much how this season has gone for the born again Kranz though.
LAST WEEK: 4-2
SEASON TOTAL: 25-24 (OVER .500 FOR THE FIRST TIME ALL YEAR!!!!!!)
ME V KAUF
Kauf is poised to beat me by 24 points. But lets look at the projections: Trent Richardson for 13? Eddie Royal for 10? Kai Forbath for 14? What a bunch of malarky! It just hurts that I wont be able to start Colin Kaepernick in a fantasy revenge matchup against his previous owner. Stupid bye weeks, Peyton & Kaep on the same one really hurts! Still, Im taking myself.
BRADY V ZMART
Did you know Zmart only scored 49 points last week? What is that, the combined bench press of all the girls you train? Oh no…what do we have here: The Detroit Lions finally have a bye! Wow, just as I was ready to crown Undefeated Watch 2013 for Thump Daddy, he starts possibly the weakest lineup anyone has put out all season. Im taking Zmart in the historic upset.
KRANZ V ZHANS
Both squads are hit pretty bad by the injury bug & bye weeks. This will be uglier than the new Fox Sports North girl, Im taking Hans.
JAMES V SRADY
It seems crazy that Srady has to start Austin Pettis & Jerome Kerley this week, considering his whole team was built around WR depth. Idk if it would matter against the juggernaut that James is becoming. He is projected to win by 33 points right now, I’m taking him.
BROOKE V MARISSA
CAT FIIIIIIIGHHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im taking Marissa.
ROSS V TAYLOR
Ross is riding the so hot right now Marvin Jones after his epic 4 TD week..and while I would love to hand Taylor the win, not starting a second RB will cost him a victory.