Week 11: Tensions. Are. High.

Coupla crazy games last weekend, huh? Couple down to the wire, unexpected finishes, eh? I havent seen this much frustration since the last time I watched  Zmart play pull tabs. Let’s go over some headlines:

  • James went from 5-1 to 5-5, all while scoring in the top 4 and including a heartbreaking loss despite scoring 156.5 last week. Hey James…..ever thought of playing some fantasy defense ya dum dum??????
  • The best division this league has seen since the Ron Swanson Division aka The Bad Division has an incredibly intense battle for spots coming, including a HUGE matchup between Prince of Polar and Team Raddo this week. Raddo must be pissing his jean jacket since a fully loaded Zhans squad could look like this: Peyton Manning, AP, Marshawn Lynch, Calvin Johnson, and Jimmy Graham. Uh idk, seems like the league’s best players at each position to me! However, Hans sits just outside of a playoff berth with three to go, and a loss to 7-3 Team Raddo could sink his season quicker than Kranz’s dumps after a late night T Bell run.
  • The Ugly Division is playing the ugly sister to the Bad Division, with all 4 teams within 2 games of each other and tbh all these suck worse than the hookers at Motel 6 by McStop, folks. The Great Kranzby v Gronknation #12 this week will give the winner a nice tiny cushion (insert Kranz flat ass joke here) for the rest of the way, but honestly Ebrostradamus could give a crap less who wins this shit hole division, would rather watch a purple dinosaur simulate masturbation with a mic stand than spend anytime more time thinking about this turd pile.

Barney JO

  • Thump Daddy got owned worse than Dred Scott by both Brooke and beloved Red Zone host Scott Hanson on social media this week. Log off bro.

IMG_0712

NOTES

Odell Beckham can catch

SMH’s of the Week: Zmart really doesn’t like starting Golden Tate for some reason. Kauf lost cuz of a kicker hehe.

MVP of the Week: Marshawn Lynch, Aaron Rodgers & Dez Bryant, Demaryious-BMarsh-Mike Wallace.

LVP of the Week: Martellus Bennett, LeSean McCoy finally scores again but only gets 19 yards on 12 carries in a close 2 pt. loss for Soule Train Express, Vernon Davis & Steve “Ice Cold” Smith

Week 11 Quick Picks

EBROLA VIRUS over Beat N Round The Bush

HEAVY BREATHING over Team Martens

PRINCE OF POLAR over Team Rademacher

GRONK NATION #12 over The Great Kranzby

CORDARRELLE PAT HER ASS SON over Everyday I’m Russel’N

THE KARDASHLESEANS over SouleTrain Express

LAST WEEK: 3-3

SEASON TOTAL: 30-30

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