Quarter Review

MVP: Julio Jones (Wrote this before the game last night, obviously gotta be Devonta Freeman)

Julio

LVP: CJ Anderson

SOD: Devonta Freeman in the 8th

Biggest Surprise: Raddo’s team being good after an interesting draft.

Draft Kings All Pro Milly Maker Team

QB: Aaron Rodgers

RB: Jamaal Charles

RB: Devonta Freeman

WR: Julio Jones

WR: DeAndre Hopkins

TE: Rob Gronkowski

Fan Duel Ramen Noodle Free Roll Team:

QB: Andrew Luck

RB: CJ Anderson

RB: Lamar Miller

WR: Mike Evans

WR: Davante Adams

TE: Jordan Cameron

Weekly League Notes:

  • Huge hit to Marissa’s Juggernaut Status with losing Jamaal Charles, and to top it off, she got womped on in a big game vs. 30 for 30. Sucks to have a 30+ point game from Devonta Freeman go to waste, but he gets those every week now
  • James claims he’s the second best team

hehehe

heheheheh

Haha No

  • Zmarts starting the season 3-0 was probably the second biggest surprise of the year, but he’s dropped two in a row and could be looking at a third here against Kauf this week. Losing Steve Smith hurt, and Julio has been limited, but Duke Johnson & Arian Foster are coming on. If only Andrew Luck was good at football….

….and he has the Pats Deflate Revenge Game

Pats v colts

  • Thumper’s crushing it, moving past Marissa for most points scored and the best record in the league…maybe the true juggernaut was hiding this whole time…HOWEVA…needs to get that RB #2 situation figured out or a bully beatdown of the commish to receive official status…fuck him up fam!!!!
  • Kranz is on a 3 game win streak, which is pretty niiiiiiiiiice after starting 0-2. This is all on Leveon Bell’s return, because outside of Tom Brady, there is just not that much here to love. Definitely a pretender, not a contender.

Sully Win Watch: As we all know, Sully has yet to taste the sweet yummy juices of victory thus far. When will he get that first W? This week is his best bet, going against me.

FAAB Summary

In some stroke of luck, motherfucking Walter Peyton was made available in free agency this week. Bids went at $58, $47, $46, $38, $35, $25, and the broke bastard himself Zhans bid $0. JK it’s just Charcandrick West of the Kansas City Chiefs, who looks to be getting 60/40 of the touches in a time split with Knile Davis. I wanna hate on this so bad but then I remember winning leagues back in the day when Priest Holmes went down in like week 7 and Larry Johnson rushed for 1750 and 20 TDs, so good things do happen when Chiefs RBs go down. Marissa retains her Juggernaut Status until further notice.

MVP of the Week:  Leveon Bell, Blake Bortles, Doug Martin

LVP of the Week: Peyton Manning, Ebro running backs (28 yards total..thats rushing AND receiving folks)

SMH of the Week:  Jamaal Charles going down…RBS are not good this year, it sucks to see one of the best get hurt. Honestly RBs are so bad, it’s worth it to discuss a change to the format of fantasy itself, whether it be taking away an RB position and adding a Flex or drafting Team RBs, which would be lame, but my god look at the RB points leaders (http://games.espn.go.com/ffl/freeagency?leagueId=155888&teamId=10&seasonId=2015#&seasonId=2015&slotCategoryId=2&avail=-1)

Doug Martin was a total bust two weeks ago + Charles Sims is top 20, I didn’t even realize Woodhead was killing it as a top ten, Jeremy Hill has been pure dog doodoo but he’s second in the league in rushing TDs. Obviously more than half of the Round One RBs are struggling mighty..Fuck RBs. Signed, Alfred Morris owner.

Fan Duel Game of the Week:

Peaky Fookin Kranzers v 30 for 30

Week 6’s best matchup is a rematch of last year’s Championship Game, in which Raddo spanked the Macho King.

Kranz says: “I’m gonna make him AND Decks get on their knees and service me!!!”

Raddo says: “I just have my squad focused and ready to compete. 30 for 30s don’t get into bulletin material, we leave that for the losers”

Draft Kings Lame of the Week:

Ebrola v Human Gerbil

This is, without a doubt, the worst matchup we will see all year. 

Sully says: “I, Brady Sullivan, could give two shits that I’m winless at this point in the season, because I know I am going to pound Ebro’s donkey dick sucking team so hard he’ll be wishing he actually went to a real donkey show. The sight of a helpless female human being getting fucked by a horse will be much more pleasant to watch than the beat down he’s about to receive.”

EBROSTRADAMUS says: ” I’m going to lose to Sully, I wish I was dead. My team is so garbage, beating Sully would count as my season highlight, so much like Lamar Odom, I’m going out with a BANG. Long live Cecil Shorts”

LAST WEEK: 0-6

chris-farley-hill-fall-o

TOTAL: 9-21

30 for 30: Encore over Peaky Fooking Kranzers

Dez Any1 Have A RB For Me? over Tay Tot’s Tuddddies

Mile High Heroes over Team Martens

Ebrola Virus over The Human Gerbil

Soule Train over I DONT WANT YOUR LIFE

The Bedonkagronks over Oops Eiferted Again

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