Weekly League Notes:
Not too much exciting going on in the FFF this week……just a matchup between THE TWO TEAMS ON JUGGERNAUT STATUS OHHHHHHHH UUUUUUYEAUUUUUUHHHH.
Lets take it away to Murdah Ray to get us pumped up for the game, in his own words:
There has been some buzz around the league that Thumper is lucky that Devonta Freeman has a bye, and while it hurts to lose the #1 RB in the game, Marissa is a Juggernaut and the next man up is Ronnie Hillman, who is in the midst of the traditional late season Broncos RB roll. Joe Flacco is in a nice matchup against the Jags, but 113 points is the lowest I’ve seen projected for Marissa in a long time. One of us, one of us, one of us. If it comes down to Eifert vs Hopkins in the Monday Night Game, that would probably be the only thing that could make that game interesting.
Thumper has some extremely generous match ups. Aaron Rodgers put up 4 TDs against the Panthers, how many do you think he could toss against the Lions? He could say fuck that fuccboi Drew Brees, his poo face, and his 7 TDs passes in a game, I’m slanging 8 today. Lions are a dumpster fire that has been burning for 60 years. They are so fucked. His three headed RB gang of AP, McFadden and Human Gerbil are healthy and thats why I give the Thumper the advantage this week. Oh and I LOVE Steven Hauschka at home v Arizona.
Speaking of Steven Hauschka, I want a full blown investigation for corruption and collusion Commish!!! How did the best kicker in the game become a free agent! A black spot on the game when stuff like this happens under all of our noses. Shame on you Sully for giving up on the season like this.
Projected Injuries This Week:
New part of the column where I guess the scenerios & injuries that lead to Antonio Andrews being the #1 RB by the end of the season
Pretty boring, a couple Pats RBs went to new homes now that Dion Lewis is done for the year, Taylaw is hoping $15 purchase Derek Carr is going for 4 TDs for the third week in a row against the Vikings this week (ha bloody ha) and the tainted Steven Hauschka was the most bid upon player.
MVP of the Week: Antonio Brown, Deangelo Williams, Dez Bryant
EBROSTRADAMUS RB Memorial LVP of the Week: Doug Martin
SMH of the Week: If Antonio Brown just has his average 25 point game, ya boi Ebro is a win better. Instead he dropped 45 and that’s without a touchdown. Fuck Fantasy.
Fan Duel Game of the Week:
Brady V Marissa
Draft Kings Lame of the Week:
Sully V Brooke
Folks, did you forget that Brooke was once 3-1? 5 straight losses has tied Sully for the longest losing streak of the season! Both these teams have 1-2 nice pieces, but everything else is pure doody. The only cool thing I can say about this game is it’s Manning V Manning…wow I can’t believe Sully is starting Peyton Manning still. He is 29th in points for QBs….29th….almost literally any other QB is guaranteed to get you more points. Child please.
LAST WEEK: 3-3
The Human Gerbil over Oops Eiferted Again
Soule Train over The Bedonkagronks
Dez Any1 Have A RB For Me? over 30 for 30: Encore
Peaky Fooking Kranzers over Team Martens
I DONT WANT YOUR LIFE over Tay Tot’s Tuddddies
Ebrola Virus over Mile High Heroes