VALHALLAH

Weekly League Notes:

Was it Miller Time this week? Was EBROSTRADAMUS right to question the reliability of Lamar Miller? If his coaching staff of stupid shit assholes could ever figure out to give the man the rock, Macho King Kranz is rolling to the title game. Instead, Miller gets 9 carries for 12 yards and a ticket to the Who Gives a Shit Bowl. It’s too bad, because otherwise his team had an outstanding week and he could’ve exacted revenge for his title game loss last season to the Raw Dogger himself.

Had Kranz fell on the other side of the bracket, he would’ve had an easy victory over Marissa or Thumper. Both teams having under 100 points in the semi’s is a black eye for the league, both started players that went into the negative, and Thumpers bench would’ve put up a fight against his starters. James White alone brought more fantasy points to the table then his starters Doug Martin, Adrian Peterson, and Javorius Allan did combined. Sad. Thumper and Kranz both have to asking what could have been….of course watching the games with notorious semi finals bed pooper James had to be a bad omen. Crying like a little baby when you lose is a great look too:

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In lieu of those title winning you deserve, especially after you were late in payments by 4 months, you can take home this trophy:

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THEN THERE WERE TWO WAITING AT THE GATES OF VALHALLA. Two elite GM’s going at it, the past two FFF winners, and frankly best of all, the chance to join EBROSTRADAMUS as the second member of the Two Time Champion Club. Been pretty lonely all these years, so come and sit at the table of greatness, won’t you?

For me, the two big factors in this matchup is the suspension of Odell Beckham Jr and the surprise cutting of Matty Ice. First of all, this OBJ suspension has to be one of the crappiest timed suspensions for fantasy owners ever, especially since he is clearly the #1 WR in the game and is pretty much matchup proof. HOWEVA, thats what you get for being a punk bitch and letting Josh Norman and da undefeated Carolina Panthers get in your head for 4 quarters. B. Hanging on to Matty Ice for this long made me wonder why we didn’t send Marissa to the looney bin, since he had been muff cabbage for months and you could snag good QBs in the FAAB all season long. So do I LIKE THAT she picked up Kirk Cousins? Hell no he is an ultimate fuckboi, but probably better than Matthew Ice so good for her.

ESPN has Raddo by ten, but I’m assuming Marissa will sub in Karlos Williams or Stevie Johnson, and I think she takes home the crown. Raddo has a lot riding on the Saints-Jaguars game being a shootout, and I’m not sure all those mouths he has to feed can eat. HOWEVA, as you can see below, I am just terrible at picks this season, so lets hear from the owners themselves:

Marissa: “Was hoping to face Kranz because he can’t rise to the occasion.”

Raddo: “It’s clear Marissa has been the 2nd best GM since my entry into the league. However, the beat down she’s about to absorb will make Ray Rice look like a pussy, grab a menu hunny, cuz ur bout to get served. #AnotherOne”

FAAB Summary

Solid championship game pick ups by both owners, love Karlos Williams & Willie Snead as replacements for late season injuries/suspensions.

MVP of the Week: Devonta Freeman, Delanie Walker

EBROSTRADAMUS RB Memorial LVP of the Week: Lamar Miller, Javorius Allen

SMH of the Week: Raddo and the rest of OBJ owners getting punked by Lawrence Tynes

LAST WEEK:1-1

TOTAL: 34-48

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