New Sheriff in Town

Two Slobberknockers decided by less than 2 points…and both are bigger heartbreakahs than Ben Affleck. Taytot lost to Thump (embarrassing) due the Tennessee Titans DEF scoring -2 against Andrew Luck, and Hans lost to Kranz by 0.3(!!!!) because Steven Gostkowski missed a fawkin extra point!! I’m about to bring my Bill Belichick Halloween outfit out of retirement and fly to Boston Mass so I can tell Gostkowski to his face that kickers aren’t ppl & he cost my friend an FFF win!

bill-belichick-microsoft-surface

Wuh-oh folks…..we got a new #1 seed. Big shoutout to TY Hilton, did you ever know you were my hero? Thx to Tyrod The Tool Man Taylor, you’re everything I would like to be. Props to Christine Michael, because of you I can fly higher than an eagle. And Rob Gronkowski, you are the wing beneath my wings.

 

Brooke needs to be praying to the fantasy gods instead of Pastor Bill’s ghost this Halloween, gassing way too many points to be 2-5. She is still in the playoffs as a 6th seed tho, so there is a silver lining.

Week 5 Quick Judgments

David Johnson is god. Jay Ajayi is Jesus.

Ebro finally nailed a preseason prediction, DeMarco Murray has been SOD.

“All Melvin Gordon does is score touchdowns.” – Buddy Ryan

Andrew Luck = MVP

Week 5 Regrets

Brooke picked a bad week to play Ebro, dropping the second highest total this week while taking the L.

Probably anybody who said Jerick McKinnion was a beast in waiting behind AP. His odds of being fantasy elite are about as good as Harambe’s odds of being in hell. Virtually nil.

102316-nfl-minnesota-vikings-jerick-mckinnon-harambe-vadapt-980-high-1

Gus Bradley for sucking soooooo hard at coaching. Blake Bortles has now lost 15 of his 17 career road games. Allen Robinson is one of the biggest busts in fantasy. So much for Jagging Off this year.

FAAB Summary:

WTF Mate?? How come Chris Thompson was not awarded to Ebro? Crikie! Congrats to Hans for playing it smart with the $11 bid, which was the exact same brilliant bid as mine. Its actually fine, I had a major stake in the Redskins(no offense, no offense) backfield and it was the worst fantasy football year of my life. Jets DEF was a popular add, I wish you could get points for all the tackles Ryan Fitzpatrick makes on his interceptions doe.

Top Dogs of the Week: Matt Forte, Andrew Luck

Lil Weenie of the Week:  Gostkowski

Bozo Move of the Week:  Hey Raddo…ever heard of starting Jay Ajaaiyiyi? Maybe play one of four players to ever have back 2 back 200 yard games, hmmmm? You are one sick pup.

Fantasy Darko aka Blessing of the Week: Ty Montgomery for $4 when he was just a WR….Raddo you sly dog.

LAST WEEK: 3-3

SEASON TOTAL: 15-21

Raddo over Hans

Zmarts over Taylor

Kauf over Forrest

Marissa over Brooke

Ebro over Thump

James over Kranz

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